A Piece of My Writing: Thoughts regarding the implications of my adoption papers…WHAT HAPPENED?

If the adoption papers are real, if that is what happened, that must be defined as trauma.

Abandoned in the street.

For how long?

In what way?


By whom?

How long was I alone for?

Was I alone?

Found by a woman?

For her to pick me up and remove me from wherever I was, I must have been clearly alone?

Was I crying?

I would have been about 4 months old.


What was I wearing?

Was I hungry?

Where did she take me?

Was she nice to me?

How had I been treated before that?

Who was my mother?

Who was the woman that carried me for nine months, gave birth to me, gave me up?

Did she do it willingly?

Was it necessary?

Did something happen to her?

Is she alive?

Did she die?

Why was I alone?

What lead me to be found in the street?

Who was the woman that found me?

Did she know me?

Is the name in my adoption papers mine from the beginning?

When was it given to me?

Where was I born?

Under what conditions?

Did my mother mean to leave me?

Was I kidnapped?

Was I abandoned?

Was I loved?

Was I missed?

Was I forgotten?

My heart breaks for the baby I once was.

Was I scared?

What happened?

What happened?



Written by Amanda Medina

March 22, 2018


PS. We’re all in this together!

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